We all want our hearts to soar for someone or something. Many of us date because we’re trying to fill those needs in love.The romance and mystery of marriage seems to hold the highest earthly peaks of pleasure and friendship. We want to contribute something significant to a meaningful cause. If you asked us, we might say we’re “pursuing marriage,” but a lot of us aren’t even close to marriage — in age, finances, maturity, education, stage of life.He wants to use you and your gifts to change other people’s lives.
If we want to have and enjoy that kind of Christ-centered intimacy, we need to get married.And if we want to get married, we need to pursue clarity about whom to marry.The spiritual war for our hearts is real, and the stakes are high, so it’s critical to ask why we think we should date in the first place.Why did I have a girlfriend when I was twelve (and thirteen, and fourteen, and even eighteen)?Has our boyfriend or girlfriend matured enough to have any idea what they might be like as a husband or wife for the next fifty years? Will one or both of us be able to provide for a family financially?
Has his or her faith in Jesus been tested enough by trials to be confident it’s real?
I had my first “girlfriend” in the sixth grade, my first kiss that summer (different girl), and then a new girlfriend almost every year through high school.
From far too young, I was looking for affection, safety, and intimacy from girls instead of from God. My teenage years were one long string of relationships that were too serious for our age, went on too long, and therefore, ended too painfully. And the devil sat front-and-center, loving every minute of my early dating history.
For many of us, we just want to be happy, to belong, to be valued.
We imagine our deepest needs being met in the intimacy of being with a special young man or woman.
He wants to show the world where to find happiness through your joy.